I Do (And So Does Everyone Else)

Today is Pakistan’s Independence Day. It should be a happy day, but I’m in kind of a somber mood, because of everything that’s been going on with Pakistan lately; thinking about how things evolve, where we come from, where we think we’re going, the plans we make for our futures, and how those futures play out.

I’ve been focusing on a lot of things today, including one really strange one: As the day to my own wedding gets closer and I buy escort cards and plan centerpiece decorations, I can’t help but think about Megan McAllister. She was supposed to get married today. She could have been spending the last week or so running around, getting her dress fittings, and massages, and pedicures. She might have been planning seating charts and putting together favors. She could have been giddy about walking down the aisle, she could’ve been nervous about stumbling over her vows, or about him having cold feet at the altar.

Instead, she got the worst case scenario- one that no woman even thinks of: Her fiancé was not a lying, cheating, bastard, who ends up fucking a stripper at his bachelor party. He was a murderous psychopath who killed a woman, beat up another, and tried to rob a stripper. He collected women’s underwear under his- no, THEIR bed. He hid a gun in a decoy Grey’s Anatomy which she may never have thought to reference. He was a homophobe who tried to pick up gay men in restrooms (who knows what he planned to do with them) - all this, without any clue, any hint, NOTHING. In ways, it’s worse than having her fiancé back out at the last minute. It’s worse than him getting into an accident and dying the day of the wedding- or any other awful thing that can happen.

She planned for a future. She thought she was going somewhere.

I wish her peace of mind, the ability to move on, the capability to love again.